Weight Goals and Body Hatred : The Truth
If being told to lose weight actually helped people lose weight, there would be no fatness and no weight loss industry. If being told, "you will die if you do not lose weight" by a medical doctor (as told to one of my clients only 25 pounds above "ideal"), or that you "are unsightly" (as self-help columnist, Ann Landers has done) helped people get thin, everyone would be thin. Few people would elect to be fat in a culture that so flagrantly hates fatness.
In fact, body hatred actually makes fear, anxiety, and chronic body dissatisfaction worse. You become more focused on your body, and hypervigilent about body size, but doesn’t make you feel better. It doesn’t even help you take better care of yourself.
Professionals are often the worst about body shaming, promoting a culture of fear and loathing around weight, bodies, and size. We are scared into believing that any extra weight will cause ill health, such as diabetes, heart disease, cancer and more.
“Health” and Body Shaming
We use health as a vehicle for body shaming: “I’m telling you that you need to lose weight for your health / for your own good / because I know you’ll feel better.” And their is often body loathing behind those “kindly” suggestions. For instance, Jean Niditch, founder of Weight Watchers, has said, “Most people have to hate themselves enough before they’ll do something about themselves.”
(Or maybe Weight Watchers is simply contributing to body shame and then promises to fix it for a price.)
Most women would agree that they need to feel bad about themselves to eat well, to exercise, and/or to lose weight. But I think they are wrong. I think Jean Niditch is so, so wrong.
Let’s take a closer look. How well do you take care of something you don’t like? On the other hand, how well do you take care of something you like? The more you like it, the better care you take of it, right?
Have you ever had a new car you loved? You probably took it in for regular maintenance, made sure it was washed and waxed, were extra careful when you parked. What about an old klunker that you were using until you could get the car of your dreams? You might of tried to get regular maintenance, but probably skipped the washing and waxing, and parked as close as you could get to your destination without a care that someone might ding your door.
Think of anything you don’t like. How well do you take care of it? Pots and pans that you don’t care about? Plants that you don’t care about?
Now consider what happens when you get pots and pans that you like? Plants that you love?
It makes sense that the more you care for something, the better you care for it. So how is it you believe that hating your body means you will take better care of it?
I have found that those who like their bodies, or at least accept them, are naturally more interested in taking care of them—to kindly eat well, to graciously move and be active, and gently pay attention to it’s needs. And they are better able to reach Their health goals.
They are also more likely to enjoy living in their bodies, and more likely to enjoy living their lives.
Even hating your body a little less can allow you some breathing room to better enjoy and take care of your “home.”
Think about hating your body a little less. Not easy to do in a world that profits from your body hatred, but well worth the effort.
About Eating Wisdom and Drs Karin and Hannah
We are two PhD level Registered and Licensed Nutritionists whose passion is to help others escape diet culture and to learn to use their natural, innate Eating Wisdom to, finally, find peace with food, eating and weight.
Check out our course, Intuitive Eating: How to Escape Diet Culture and Become an Empowered Eater,. plus we have lots of info and handouts (including the original Hunger Fullness Scale) at our website, www.EatingWisdom.com. We also offer 1:1 nutrition therapy. Take advantage of our combined 40+ years of experience and reach out today!
© 2018 Karin Kratina, PhD, RD, LDN.